Harry & the Hedge Fund Managers

Apparently some lady reported seeing Sasquatch in Fairfield. That seems like a weird place for Big Foot to be hanging out. What’s he live in a cave sandwiched between two giant houses and their chemical laden lawns?

The lady reported it to the police, and apparently suburban Sasquatch doesn’t move very fast because the police were able to catch up with him.

She told police the hairy beast was 8 feet tall and had “legs like tree trunks.” It ran off after she switched her headlights to high beams.

Police say they searched and found a 16-year-old boy dressed in a gorilla-like costume. He told them he was standing at the intersection of Unquowa and Sturges roads, waving at passing cars while friends watched.

Normally I would blame a sighting like this on Plum Island, but even I don’t believe Big Foot could swim across the sound.