Is that a snake in your pocket?

I barely know where to start:

HARTFORD — – A 20-year-old driver told police his baby pet snakes are to blame for a multi-car crash he caused on Main Street Monday morning.

Angel Rolon, of New Britain, lost control of his SUV as he and a passenger scrambled to catch the two snakes, he told police. He said they escaped from his pants pockets and slithered down near the gas and brake pedals, police said.

Rolon is charged with reckless driving, failure to drive in proper lane, driving while being distracted and driving without a license.

At least three other cars were involved in the crash, reported to police at 10:20 a.m. Rolan’s SUV sustained heavy front end damage and rolled over onto the driver’s side.

Animal control responded to the scene but did not find the snakes, police said.

OK, so let me get this straight. This guy claims he keeps baby snakes, of an unspecified  type (boy I hope they weren’t our local Timber Rattlesnakes) in his pockets, and that they escaped from their groin-nest, and no one noticed until they were already down near his feet. You’d think one would notice if a writhing pit of vipers next to your junk made a run for it. Perhaps they got out through a hole in his pocket and headed for “the hills” down his pants leg.

No matter how the critters got out, I am alarmed that they were never found. What if these serpents are now stalking the neighborhoods of Hartford, getting fat on ‘hood rats, and scaring drug dealers (and the kids from the suburbs who buy the drugs)? What if these aren’t our own native rattlers, but some exotic, invasive species? What was an absurd excuse for an accident could turn into an environmental diaster!

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