Santeria on the Move

I’m running out of Santeria jokes… and also starting to wonder if I’m blacking out and am the real cause behind all this Santeria madness.

What exactly am I rambling about today, you may ask? Well this NBCConnecticut story will sum it up for you:

East Hartford police are investigating after finding a dead sheep and candles in a circle on a path in a wooded area off Main Street early Wednesday morning.

Police responded to the back of 740 Main Street, near town hall, at 7:17 a.m. on Wednesday and found the candles and a sheep, dead in the water.

As you know, up until now, Bridgeport has been Connecticut’s Santeria hotspot. But now it seems that voodoo priestesses are coming to East Hartford. Yes, residents reported seeing two women dressed all in white disappear into the woods with a sheep, also dressed in white, and then seeing candles flickering in the woods. Why no one called the police then is beyond me, but as we all know, snitches get stitches so some poor sheep ended up losing its life and floating belly up in a, no doubt polluted, river.

This picture of the scene is not nearly as interesting as the eyewitness descriptions.

What I’m wondering, though, is why Santeria seems to be following me — like chickens do. Yes, I’ve seen chickens everywhere I’ve lived since I moved to NJ about five years ago. I saw chickens feeding near the Hudson River in NJ from my bus window, one hanging out in a church yard in Norwalk on my walk to the train, a couple eating on the side of the road in Easton, and now there’s one living and making noise in my neighborhood.  So I’m starting to wonder if I suffer from some sort of disorder where I black out and practice Santeria — perhaps even involving the aforementioned chickens — and that’s why it has migrated from Bridgeport up to East Hartford.

Someone call Dr. Gold! I think I need help.


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