An Open Letter to The Reminder

These are not letters to the editors. These are trolls... You're THE WORST!

These are not letters to the editors. These are trolls… You’re THE WORST!

Dear The Reminder:

You are the worst! THE WORST! 

What passes for journalism in your pages is laughable (and that’s coming from someone who writes for this site…so ya know your shit is bad)! I’ve actually sat in on town meetings you’ve reported on and then read your article about it only to wonder if you a) were are the same meeting b) understand what editors are for (seriously, not every quote needs to make it into the story). You can’t even get a high school football team’s record right! But that’s not what has me up in arms today… Today, I’m pissed about the mess you leave in neighborhoods around the state.

Oh sure, in Glastonbury you hang little hooks on the mailbox posts and hang the bags nicely. But in my hood, you just toss those things where ever the hell you please. (And last week, the degenerate you had delivering the paper damn near ran me off the road as she drove the wrong way down the street with her door open.) The papers pile up on sidewalks, clog storm drains, and decompose in the driveways of empty houses. And as far as I can tell, you make no effort to clean up the mess you make. I’m pretty sure that half of the flash floods this year are a direct result of  your papers clogging storm drains.

It should tell you something about the quality of your publication that people don’t bother to pick it up or notice when it doesn’t show up. You’re an environmental disaster and blight on neighborhoods across the state!

I realize you probably aren’t going to go out of business just to please me, so maybe you should consider doing the community a service and holding a Reminder Clean-Up Day where all your employees comb the streets of Connecticut, picking up the little blue bags with your “newspaper” inside, and recycle those turds. If you do that, I promise not to tell your advertisers just how many of your papers actually go completely unseen.

Cordially,

The Anti-Couric

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