Election Day: The Scrapper vs. The Brat

It’s almost election day. This means we can all look forward to a time when we can plunk down on our couches for hours at a time without the incessant political ads that give us all indigestion. If you’re like me and use an antenna instead of cable, you may even be lucky enough to get political ads from our neighbor to the north. And I do mean lucky, because at least you can watch those knowing you don’t have to vote for any of the fools behind them.

From The Courant

If you didn’t pick up on it yourself, you have no doubt heard about how acrimonious the race for governor has become. Frankly the candidates hate each other. You can’t really blame them. neither one seems like a nice guy. And at times, they both seem to hate everyone else. But for a while now something has been nagging at me. A few weeks back Tom Foley seemed to take a swipe at Dan Malloy’s skills as a father based on some issues Malloy’s son has had with drugs.

Is this supposed to win Foley points with the common man? Who among us doesn’t have an alcoholic uncle, a crackhead cousin, or a pill-popping brother? You can’t swing a kitchen chair in my family without hitting someone with some issue or another (and we swing a lot of kitchen chairs in our family). I imagine it’s not all that different in most families. So, Tom Foley, are you blaming our family members for the problems of their offspring? What about that failing mental healthcare system you’re so fond of blaming for the Newtown shooting? Do you think that might have something to do with the addiction problems that plague so many of our fellow Nutmeggers? 

A while back Colin McEnroe wrote a column where he wrote these words:

Republican Tom Foley: “Connecticut in 2014 is a dreary counterfeit of reality, indeed a valley of nearly constant agony created by the miserable failures of the Malloy administration. If I am elected I will restore Connecticut to vibrancy by ending its current toxic anti-business practices, although the only one I can specifically cite is mandatory paid sick leave. So even though the person waiting on you at Denny’s may have viral hemorrhagic fever, you will be doing better in other ways. I’m Tom Foley, and I hate you.”

Democrat Dan Malloy: “Connecticut in 2014 is a dreary counterfeit of reality, indeed a valley of nearly constant agony created by the miserable failures of the Rowland and Rell administrations. Since inheriting their messes, I have worked around the clock to preserve and create jobs. This has necessitated a wholesale transfer of assets from average citizens to big companies. That is just a first step. I am very close to thinking of a second. I’m Dan Malloy, and I have conflated you with someone who was mean to me as a child.”

I often find myself thinking about this column when I’m wondering why Malloy’s generally brusque persona doesn’t bother me as much as Foley’s general unpleasantness. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it until recently. Well, all you have to do is watch these two videos.

Governor Malloy does kind of have the air of someone who was bullied as a kid and learned to stand up for himself, no matter what. Tom Foley has the air of a guy who was never challenged and gets annoyed when anyone dares to confront him. Malloy is a scrapper, a little dog that nips at your ankles to let you know he ain’t scared. Tom Foley is a spoiled brat who never hears the word “No”, and who thinks it’s your grandmother’s fault that Uncle Bob drinks too much.

So if you’re one of the select few who bothers to vote in mid-term elections be sure to keep my highly detailed and well informed analysis in mind. And if you can’t, just remember that Tom Foley hates you.