An Open Letter to the Gilmore Guys

qbvnui3aDear Demi and Kevin (aka Gilmore Guys),

I just finished driving from Hartford to New Haven and back again while listening to your take on “Introducing Lorelai Planetarium,” and all about how much you loved Boston. I couldn’t help but feel a little twinge as I realized that you will probably never do a live show here in Connecticut. Frankly, fellas, this seems like an oversight on your part.

Now, I realize you can’t visit every tiny city with a civic center, but it seems to me that Connecticut’s cities deserve special consideration. This is the place that the Gilmores call home. Richard and Emily probably lived on Scarborough Street in Hartford, and somewhere there is a guy sitting under a tree in New Haven just waiting for Rory to come and pay him to leave. And somewhere out in the Northwest corner of the state, there’s a Miss Patty waiting to sexually harass two young gentlemen with a podcast. So, I’m here to make a case for us.

Consider for a moment, a dark alternate reality in which Amy Sherman Palladino had never visited the Mayflower Inn and startled the sedate town folk with her hats. There would be no Gilmore Girls if she hadn’t left New York City and headed to the wilds of Litchfield County to get a massage and cucumber water. That, my friends, is a world not worth living in. That is a bleak hellscape that even Tom Hardy could not survive in.

It seems pretty reasonable to assume that a trip to Connecticut might inspire the same creative genius in you.

Now, let’s assume that a science museum and an unfinished minor-league baseball stadium don’t interest you. Hartford still has plenty to offer a couple of single guys on the prowl. You can spend the day at the Mark Twain House and the Wadsworth Atheneum. After the show you can get dinner at Bear’s Smoke House, and then drown your sorrows at one of our many bars filled with Deans.

If none of that catches your attention, there’s always New Haven. You can wander the hallowed halls of Yale, see the largest collection of British art outside of the U.K. for free, get the best falafel in the state at Kasbah, and then party at one of our many bars filled with Logans.

If our immensely rich culture and history don’t interest you, well, I guess you could visit Bridgeport.

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We have theaters and venues that vary in size:

I know that your other concern might be finding a guest for the show. You might think Connecticut’s comedy talent pool is limited…and you’re right. Basically we have one suggestion: Gilly-loving actress, comedian, and Hartford resident Carolyn Paine. But if she can’t do it, I’d be happy to fill in. I’m basically Rory, and I could totes bring my Lane… and we both have radio experience.

It seems a damn shame to let the entire series go by and never come visit the state that helped inspire it. Think of it this way: Even if you hate it here, you’re just a short train ride away from New York and/or Boston.

Sincerely,

The Anti-Couric

 

 

 

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