high school

Canton Students Need a Lesson in Human Decency

cant-unsee-funny-donald-trump-meme-picture-for-whatsappYou may have seen an article in The Hartford Courant detailing the behavior of a bunch of teenage turds from Canton. Here’s the gist:

Kids from Canton chanted “Trump! Trump!”(and even made signs) during a basketball game at their opponents from Classical Magnet School.

I’m not sure I can think of a lamer, less creative chant to use on your opponents, but hey, what can you expect from Trump fans?

One might rush to associate this kind of incident with the sentient cheese doodle we elected President and the outburst of racist a-holery that has swept the country since then. You’d be partially, kinda, sorta wrong, though.  (more…)

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Connecticut Teen Spawns Poorly Written Guide to D-Baggery

Nutmeggers, we have a problem. Earlier today Jezebel printed something called Steps to Becoming a Douche Bag, a truly odious tome penned by a Connecticut high schooler back in 2010. Apparently this was some sort of freemium scheme, where he hoped that other losers would be so desperate for access to his wisdom that they would pay for more of it. The kid is in college now — we can only assume he attends Wesleyan, where he can put his (terrible) writing skills and lack of a moral compass to good use — so we’re guessing he didn’t become a millionaire off of this idea (mostly because he totally ripped it off from other creeps). He also, apparently, didn’t get kicked out of high school, which says a lot about the institution charged with educating this walking STD.

I’m not going to rehash the whole thing because it’s actually pretty boring and not very funny. If you’ve ever had the extreme displeasure of being exposed to any of Mystery’s pick-up artist techniques, you pretty much know what this kid has to say. But here are some of the dirtiest little turd nuggets from his guide to douchebaggery:

  • Sluts are always going to be talking to many other players so it is your job to make them want you, not show that you want them
  • Talk about how your looking for a good girl and when they ask you who likes you bring up one of there rivals [homophones are not this kid’s strong suit]
  • Make sure you have backup plans because when dealing with a [Perfect Medium] your going to need to play hard to get, so work your slut and goodie goodies while you progress on the PM

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